Monday, October 31, 2005


Summer is officially dead and the sky creeping over its corpse is cleric grey and thick with cloud .A proto-hangover is creeping on the edge of my head but other than that I feel ok, I suppose one good thing about having flexible sleeping patterns is that things like jet lag and the British summer time adjustment never really adversely affect me.

Winter is a bad time to be single. But the effort that it would take to trick a girl into believing I am a nice enough guy to go out with, doesn’t seem worth it.

I have work today, six hours of alternating between stunning boredom and frustrating busyness. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, the more I need a job is directly proportionate to how much I dislike it.

Anyway breakfast. Shower. Then work

Its now six working hours and one arrested brother later and I’m wondering if I can mix Bacardi with the horrid diet energy drink I bought by accident. The solitary emergency bud is doing a sterling job but i'm going to need reinforcements if i’m to survive the night of worry and mom soothing that lies ahead.

Detail are sketchy at the moment, from what I can gather my brother and his dim witted, hood wearing, fucktard friends were twatting about in the road and one of them got hit (not seriously, unfortunately) my brother flagged down the offending car and got arrested. Apparently he sounded pretty upset so they could have just arrested him to get him of the street; my brother is a big hulk of a guy so to see him upset and unpredictable is potentially quite scary, shit I’d arrest him.

So what can we do? We wait; we wait and see how badly my brother has fucked up this time. We wipe up after him, listen to his excuses this time, we patiently wait while he makes heartfelt promises not to do it again. And then we wait for him to do it again.

Post script- I love that moment when you first wake up and your mind is completely blank, when absolutely everything is forgotten and your mind is pure white. Any sin, transgression or worry is lifted and you just are. It doesn’t take long for reality to settle in though.

My brother is still not home, I don’t want to mention it to mom but if they where just keeping him in overnight to teach him a lesson he would be home by now.

Christ, I just heard a door closing downstairs, so I shot out of chair and ran to see if it was him, like a fucking puppy- hes my brother despite it all, I know how scared he is now and I would still swap places with him in a heartbeat.


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